There are times in life when everything seems to happen all at once—work deadlines collide with personal upheavals, relationships strain, finances wobble, and you’re left wondering how to stay upright when it all feels like too much. The truth is, chaos is inevitable. But learning how to find calm within it—that’s a skill that can change how you live, love, and move through the world.
Inner calm isn’t about escaping life’s storms; it’s about learning how to stand in the rain without losing yourself. It’s about cultivating a sense of groundedness so that, even when things feel uncertain or out of your control, you can still find moments of clarity, peace, and strength. Trust me, I know all too well. From dealing with addiction to depression, a change of six career paths, and the most recent, selling everything I own and moving from Toronto, Canada, to Valencia, Spain.
Here’s how to begin finding that calm, even when life seems to be spinning off its axis.
1. Acknowledge What’s Happening—Without Judgment
The first step toward calm isn’t control—it’s awareness. When life feels overwhelming, the natural instinct is to resist it, to push back and fight for order. But that resistance often amplifies the stress.
Instead, take a moment to simply acknowledge what’s happening. You don’t have to like it, and you don’t have to have all the answers. Try saying to yourself: “This is what’s happening right now. It’s difficult, but I can handle it one step at a time.”
Mindfulness isn’t about pretending things are fine—it’s about allowing yourself to see things as they are, without the extra weight of judgment or self-blame. You can’t navigate what you refuse to see clearly.
2. Breathe Like You Mean It
It sounds cliché because it’s simple—and it works. When stress hits hard, your body responds before your mind catches up. Your breathing quickens, your muscles tense, and your thoughts race.
Deep, intentional breathing interrupts that spiral. Try this: inhale deeply through your nose for a count of four, hold for four, then exhale through your mouth for six. Repeat it three or four times.
You’re not just “calming down”—you’re signalling to your nervous system that you’re safe. Your body believes what your breath tells it.
You can do this anywhere—at your desk, in traffic, in bed at 2 a.m. when your mind won’t stop. It’s one of the easiest ways to reclaim a moment of calm in the middle of mental noise.
3. Simplify What You Can, Release What You Can’t
One of the biggest causes of overwhelm is trying to manage everything at once. But not everything deserves equal energy. When things pile up, try to separate what’s within your control from what isn’t.
Ask yourself:
- What can I take action on right now?
- What can wait?
- What’s completely outside my control?
Then act accordingly. Simplify what you can—whether that’s decluttering your space, saying no to another obligation, or asking for help—and release what you can’t.
Learning to let go isn’t giving up. It’s choosing not to waste precious energy on things you have no power to change.
4. Create Small Anchors in Your Day
When life feels chaotic, routines can become lifelines. Even the smallest rituals can give structure to your day and remind you that you’re still in control of something.
It might be a quiet morning coffee before the world wakes up, a daily walk without your phone, journaling for five minutes before bed, or lighting a candle and sitting in stillness. For me, it’s all the above and taking time each day to stretch, which not only helps me find my balance mentally, but it also helps me sleep better and feel better overall.
These little anchors act like reset buttons—moments where you reconnect with yourself amid the noise. The key is consistency, not complexity. One small daily act of peace has more impact than a dozen elaborate self-care rituals you never have time for.
5. Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Body
When life feels heavy, we tend to live entirely in our heads—spinning through worries, what-ifs, and endless scenarios. The body, meanwhile, holds all that stress without relief.
Movement helps bridge that gap. You don’t have to run marathons or hit the gym every day. Just move. Stretch, dance, take a walk, do yoga, swim—anything that gets you out of your mind and back into your body.
Physical movement releases built-up tension, increases circulation, and triggers endorphins that naturally lift one’s mood. More importantly, it brings one back to the present moment, where calmness lives.
As I mentioned, stretching has always been a big part of my routine, and so has waking, and ever since I adopted my dog Manny, he’s been an integral part of that routine.
6. Disconnect to Reconnect
In a world where we’re constantly connected, it’s easy to forget how draining it can be to absorb a nonstop stream of information, opinions, and bad news.
When you’re already feeling emotionally maxed out, constant digital stimulation keeps your nervous system on high alert. That’s why unplugging, even for short periods, can be transformative.
Try setting aside an hour a day—or even one full evening a week—where you disconnect from screens entirely. No emails, no social media, no notifications. Instead, do something tactile and grounding: cook a meal, read a physical book, take a long bath, or go for a walk outside.
The silence that follows can feel uncomfortable at first—but that stillness is where your mind begins to settle.
7. Practice the Art of Saying “No”
One of the biggest barriers to inner calm is overcommitment. Many of us struggle to say “no,” whether it’s to protect others’ feelings, maintain an image, or avoid guilt. But saying yes to everything is a fast track to burnout.
Every “yes” you give takes energy. If you give too many away, there’s none left for yourself. Learning to say “no” is not selfish—it’s self-preserving.
When your plate is full, ask yourself: If I say yes to this, what am I saying no to instead? Sometimes peace requires boundaries, even if they make others uncomfortable.
8. Let Yourself Feel It All
Finding calm doesn’t mean suppressing emotions—it means creating space to feel them without letting them take over.
If you’re angry, anxious, sad, or exhausted, allow yourself to feel it fully. Write it out, talk to someone you trust, or cry if you need to. Buried emotions don’t disappear; they build pressure. Releasing them—safely and consciously—is a way of clearing mental clutter.
There’s no shame in needing help, either. Talking to a therapist or counsellor can be a powerful act of self-care, especially when life feels unmanageable. Calm isn’t always something you can find alone, and that’s okay.
9. Return to Gratitude, Even When It’s Hard
It may sound overly simplistic, but gratitude shifts perspective. When everything feels chaotic, it’s easy to focus only on what’s wrong. Taking a moment to recognize what’s still good—no matter how small—can anchor you back into the present.
Try writing down three things each day that you’re grateful for. They don’t have to be profound: a warm cup of tea, your dog’s tail wagging, a stranger’s kindness, a song that hits you just right.
Gratitude doesn’t erase challenges—but it reminds you that even in tough times, there’s still light.
10. Remember: Calm Is a Practice, Not a Destination
Inner peace isn’t a permanent state. It’s a practice you return to, again and again. Some days you’ll feel centred and grounded; other days, you’ll feel like you’re barely hanging on. That’s normal.
The goal isn’t to eliminate all stress or struggle—it’s to meet them with compassion, perspective, and steadiness.
Think of calm as a muscle. The more you practice awareness, breathing, boundary-setting, and gratitude, the stronger that muscle becomes. Over time, you’ll find that even when life feels unpredictable, you’re no longer swept away so easily.
Finding Stillness in the Noise
In a world that glorifies busyness, slowing down can feel rebellious. But the truth is, stillness isn’t a luxury—it’s essential. When you cultivate inner calm, you don’t just cope better with chaos; you transform how you experience it.
You start to trust yourself more, make clearer decisions, stop reacting to every external pressure, and start responding with intention.
Because peace doesn’t come from the absence of problems—it comes from the presence of self-awareness. And once you find that within yourself, no matter how turbulent life becomes, you’ll always have a place to return to.

