How Apps Made Dating Less Creepy (Yes, Really…)

Did you know 40% of American couples now meet through technology? And yet, we all know some anachronistic holdout who insists finding a partner online is “creepy.” Well, as someone who met her spouse on OkCupid (true story!), I’d like to refute the notion that using apps to find love is somehow unsavory.

Here’s a list of reasons why meeting a lover online is actually less creepy than analogue dating (i.e. hitting on random strangers IRL).

1. Consent

I’m not sure why anyone romanticizes the olden days, back when people used to randomly approach each other in public. The idea that we once clocked someone cute from across the bar, then approached them, interrupted whatever they were doing, and hit on them in the hopes they were both single and looking to mingle, feels positively primeval. Why don’t we just cure strep throat with leeches while we’re at it?

I for one am happy most dudes are on Tinder, swiping for ladies who actually want to talk to them as opposed to approaching me and my friends at a restaurant and interrupting our very important conversations about The Bachelor.

The way many apps are structured eliminates the possibility of being approached by users when you don’t want to be. The fact that you have to match with a Tinder or Bumble user before speaking to them prevents us from being that obnoxious jerk approaching people who’d rather be left alone. Thus, hitting on someone becomes a more consensual process, and consent is super sexy!

2. You Can Set Parameters

Dating can be the tedious, but I can’t imagine how much more time people must have wasted before apps were invented. Why? The filters breed efficiency. Let’s say you’re super lazy and only interested in people who live within a five-mile radius? Well, you can tell the algorithm to filter out anyone who resides too many subway stops from your couch. On many apps, can also filter for other things that may be important to you, like age or religion. Basically, dating apps turn regular citizens into magicians capable of conjuring up the kinds of people they’re interested in. Why would ever try to meet someone at da club again?

3. You Can Do It In Your Pajamas

Before apps, dating was exhausting. Not only did you have to leave your house to go on dates, but you had to leave your house just to get dates! Back when it was only possible to meet potential partners in the wild, you couldn’t just return home after work to rewatch Grey’s Anatomy while simultaneously finding a date on Coffee Meets Bagel. No, you had to venture out in public, find someone who looked like you might want to see them naked, then approach them on the off chance they were single. The very thought of putting that much effort into finding a first date makes me want to take a nap!

Dating apps may just be superior to every other method of meeting potential mates, because you can do it in your pajamas, with a bowl of pop chips for company. Everyone knows, anything worth doing can be accomplished without wearing pants!


What are your thoughts on dating apps?  Tweet us at @weraddicted and share!

Sarah Sahagian

Sarah Sahagian

Sarah Sahagian is a feminist writer based in Toronto. Her byline has appeared in such publications as Elle Canada, Flare, Bitch Media, The Toronto Star, and The National Post. She is also the co-host of You Do You: A Dating Podcast. Sarah holds a master’s degree in Gender Studies from The London School of Economics. You can find her on Twitter, where she posts about politics and live-tweets The Bachelor