While I and millions around the world watched with bated breath as the reality tv juggernaut Love is Blind played out to record viewership over the last few weeks, we now have been left with the question: Is love really blind?
Listen to Episode 70 of You Do You: a Dating Podcast below:
While the results of the tv show are mixed, some couples never made it anywhere, some got axed off the show, some made it to the altar and said no, the outcome was truly a mixed bag, so did it answer the question.
Well, we can all have our opinions about the show, reality tv and ‘social experiments’, the beginning portion of the show that had singles dating in pods thus removing any visual attractions to start, it does lead one to think, if we all had the chance to meet and really fall for someones personality sight unseen, would it lead to love and a relationship in the real world.
Well here’s what we know:
Personality changes everything
Ever met someone and on first glance you think, ya, their ok looking, and move onto the next thought. Then after spending some time with the person you seemingly find them more attractive?
It’s because we all form connections, even just after a light conversation, but as we learn more about someone, it can help further connect, and thus draw you in more.
While in the beginning, his smile seemed crooked, you now look at it and the way he laughs and thinks it’s endearing. The perspective changed based on the growth of the connection and time to become more accustom to the person.
As time passes and the connection grows, it allows for the opportunity to take the person in more, what makes them special, their quirks, character traits and these things tie together to determine what makes us truly interested and even attracted to someone.
Friendship and respect are the keys to a good relationship
Whether you are face to face, over the phone or online, the first building blocks to any relationship are friendship and respect.
Learning about someone, getting to know them, their likes and dislikes, their life, family, and what makes them tick isn’t excluded to in person, it can be built in a multitude of ways, so it doesn’t come as any surprise that we are form bonds and start building something real without meeting.
People used to do it via letter, then emails, and text and now it seems like there are actually too many ways to communicate, all without actually being eye to eye, so do you really need to see someone to start something real? It seems not.
Taking the time to focus on listening and learning is necessary for starting a healthy relationship
I think back to most of the dates and relationships I had in my 20’s and one of my many mistakes was not listening. I’m sure many of us are guilty of that. So what happens when you remove social media, phones, the outside world, and ever the person you are talking to, all you can really do is listen.
This to when you were a teenager (for those maybe over 30) and how hours and hours would go by as we chatted away our teen years on the phone driving our parents crazy.
Now while we might not have the time for that as you get older, it makes you think about how much you knew about your friends. I knew their fave bands, clothes, foods, taste in guys or girls, the list was endless case we talked and listened, but do we lose that as we get older.
Maybe some of us lose that skill along the way, but it’s that’s all you had, it is was the only way to communicate, if it was someone of interest, I think most of us would make the effort.
I must say, in my 30’s I’ve really learned to just take a breath, open my ears and my mind and not only hear, but really listen, and it’s made a world of difference.
Sometimes love just happens
Way before the reality tv trash gem that is Love is Blind, we have heard the phase through the ages, and for some, maybe it truly is. Some love is hard to understand, some transcend age and stage, some inspires and unites.
While we as humans have been trying to pin down what love really is and all the facets it offers, sometimes we just can’t really explain truly why we feel for some on a deeper level the other.
Maybe it’s fit, maybe it’s just character or sexual chemistry, whatever it may be, I do believe for some, love truly is blind.
So whether you believe or not, whether you choose to date online, or get to know each other sight unseen, may you find, keep and enjoy all the love your heart desires, from one bleeding heart to a world of believers.
Take a listen below to the latest Episode of You Do You: a Dating Podcast below!